July 26, 2008

Hi Everyone, Those who know me, know I like a good fight. This doesn't mean I look for Foreman/Ali bouts, but more that I, as a City of St.Paul champion debater, love to banter. I found some formidable opponents, whose combined weight is only 108 pounds, but I was looking at being KOed anyway. See, I am still recovering, and I get wobbly and heavy headed after a little bit of exertion. My head has a the ability to target in on a pillow like some sort of missile device, and I call out to the kids that they are going to have to entertain themselves. I will get the reply "may we watch TV?", and I, thinking it is better than waking to find we have to go to the ER, say "yes". Mistake my friends: the TV that I had been allowing to babysit my kids is evil. I awoke to hear "Yeah me!" and discovered my daughter was aspiring to live in a hotel with a frou-frou dog, and realized that I had not given the decision enough reflection. I tried to explain that this was an unfortunate character, and they were making light of her situation: having tons of money in lieu of her parent's presence. To no avail. We discussed counting our blessings vs credit cards. I could not reel her back in. It was then that It was then I banned the show. Actually, I banned all of Disney channel. Some of you might think this rash, but wait: it gets better... We argued and discussed - too long I guess, because I eventually said "I don't want to hear it from you two any more". It was then that a character named Chelsea Diggers came in (Collin) dressed in a crushed velvet dress and CZ clip-ons came in, and (she) tried to make a case for watching the show. I tried not to laugh, took a picture, commended them on their ingenuity, and said "no, for the last time". When I came down I found a letter on my pillow telling me to "Lusen" up, signed Kristen, Collin, and Chelsea Diggers. I tried not to cry, admitted failure as a parent, and asked Chris to relieve me of duty - permanently. He refused, citing it was my job, and he went to talk to her about how, even though the sutures have long come out and I may "look" fine, I was still recovering - and could they take it easy on me. Although I wanted hole up in our cabin up top, and cry in a bottle of gin, I trudged upstairs and began searching websites on restricting TV, and pouring over scripture on obeying your parents. I called them in, and pitched them my case, to which they listened and said "yes Ma'am" and left. I hung my head and did cry. A second letter materialized, saying they were sorry for "Braking" my heart, singed Kristen, Collin, (and yes), Chelsea Diggers! I laughed like a manic, and will psychologically prepare for the next bout. I have been told they get more difficult. And for the life of me - I don't know where she got such a stubborn streak?!
Love,
Jules